Birthdays

Birthdays are such a farce. So you survived for another year. Hooray. But this is not why people celebrate them, is it? They do not celebrate simple survival. Do they even know why they celebrate it, I wonder? I'm inclined to say no. To most, it is not much more than an excuse for a party. And everybody does it, anyway, so they probably should too. And what could be the harm?

Perhaps some think that maybe it could just be nice to make someone feel special for a day. But you’re not special. You never were, and you’re not when it’s your birthday. You’re still just an insignificant speck of dust in the universe, and, in the end, none of your actions matter.

But on your birthday they congratulate you. When they do this it makes me feel I should have done something to be congratulated for - some accomplishment or other. But the only thing I did was not die. Wow. What’s the use of congratulating someone for not doing anything in particular? Won’t this only possibly discourage future efforts to accomplish something? Won’t this only create in people a sense of entitlement to gifts and praise that is completely unearned?

I dislike all this attention because at some point in the past I unwillingly left a uterus and came forth into this horrible world, especially because I did nothing to warrant it. But mainly their “happy birthdays” remind me how much I hate ever having been born. Oh, but you only wanted to be nice, right? Yes, yes, I know I’m a dick for not being appreciative of misplaced praise. I’m sure you meant well. I’d just rather you questioned why exactly it is that you do things. If you feel you have got a good reason for celebrating birthdays, tell me below. And no, I don’t want any gifts.